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<title>Hades' Journal: Apologize by EllisEmme_Writes</title>
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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/22379293">Hades' Journal: Apologize</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/EllisEmme_Writes/pseuds/EllisEmme_Writes'>EllisEmme_Writes</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Series:</b></td><td>Ellis' 500 Word Constraints [2]</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Lore Olympus (Webcomic)</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>F/M</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-01-23</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-01-23</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-04-28 15:35:31</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Teen And Up Audiences</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>503</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/22379293</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/EllisEmme_Writes/pseuds/EllisEmme_Writes</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>Small Writing Challenges for myself. I pick scenes from Lore Olympus (c) Rachel Smythe<br/>I pick some inspiration (a song/lyrics/etc)<br/>I add context and I limit my word count to 500. Enjoy. - Ellis</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Hades/Minthe (Lore Olympus)</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Series:</b></td><td>Ellis' 500 Word Constraints [2]</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Series URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/series/1597243</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>4</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>32</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>Hades' Journal: Apologize</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Dear Journal,</p><p>Therapist assigned: journaling to explore feelings. Early on, Life was Me, Cerberus, the wards, and my (prisoners); Ha! Zeus called them my <em>responsibilities</em> in Tartarus.  Solitary but simple. Its less simple now; running for anxiety and therapy for persistent night terrors, sweats, and  threats of Chronos's escape. Nightmares frighten Minthe from my bed; Fuck. Her comforts are thwarted by the deepening the hollows of her eyes flashing me to the lightless pit where I suffered. She can't hide that fear -- she's lied before. Would she lie now? </p><p><strong>I'm holding on your rope, got me ten feet off the ground</strong> </p><p>
  <strong>And I'm hearing what you say, but I just can't make a sound</strong>
</p><p>We work, except for when we don't. My brothers regard Minthe with bitter cruelty. I defend her, empathize, but shoulder it. My name is not bound with the skies or seas, no temples bare my name -- I am unseen; feared. My hopeful desperation bound in blind complacency; or is it apathy now? She has stayed longer than most. </p><p>
  <strong>You tell me that you need me then you go and cut me down, but wait</strong>
</p><p>I ask what she yearns for, her desires. Things, objects, trifles, and of course, I give. I yield to her whims. Truly when pressed, her venom knows no bounds. She'd need venom to rule, but she lacks -- compassion, grace.</p><p>
  <strong>You tell me that you're sorry, didn't think I'd turn around, and say (that)</strong>
</p><p>Yet, after the empassioned tears; her tantrums, blows, and fury; I wonder about her true feelings -- is she ashamed of her king, or just me. </p><p>
  <strong>I said, "It's too late to apologize (it's too late)."</strong>
</p><p>
  <strong>I'd take another chance, take a fall, take a shot for you</strong>
</p><p>Am I resigning myself to this? Oh, Hera, with you, for you, -- I would’ve stayed - I could've taken him. Look--my words betray me. Minthe is my option -- but was there really a choice? </p><p>
  <strong>And I need you like a heart needs a beat, but it's nothin' new (yeah) </strong>
</p><p>
  <strong>I loved you with a fire red, now it's turning blue, and you say,</strong>
</p><p>Is it wrong to want an equal to rule with me? Minthe won't be an equal at first; she could be an <strong><em>okay</em></strong> queen of the underworld. She could grow into it, over time -- if I asked her-- I will ask --  but what of her answer? If she refused?</p><p>
  <strong>"Sorry," like the angel heaven let me think was you, but I'm afraid...</strong>
</p><p>Even now, her request: new Chanel bag, gift-wrapped, and ready. I texted twice; no reply.  I don't want to go to the party if she'll refuses.  The embarrassment is too much. Fuck this. Fuck me for thinking I could count on her.</p><p>
  <strong>"It's too late to apologize (it's too late)."</strong>
</p><p>If I skip, I'll never hear the end of it from Hera. She's going to stand me up--Alone again.</p><p>Before, things were lonely but simple -- I could go for some simple about now.  </p><p> </p><p>I need a drink. </p><p> </p><p>-A.Hades.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZSM3w1v-A_Y </p><p>Timbaland, OneRepublic - Apologize<br/>songwriter Ryan Tedder   "Apologize"</p></blockquote></div></div>
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